Remember how it felt?

So its finally becoming somewhat cool out in Texas on some days and all evenings... This is something long awaited for by myself. I really love changing seasons in general, but especially cooler weather. I'm missing the beauty of the trees changing in my Midwestern home, I hear the leaves here pretty much just go from green to brown.... but at least the cooler weather is a welcome excuse to dress the way I prefer to and get outdoors just for the heck of it.

So the other night, after it had gotten dark here, my little cousin Emi and I went out for a nice evening bubble blowing on the back patio. It was awesome to say the least. I have the over-anticipatory habit of wearing too many layers because I really want to do so now that its finally cool. So I was practically bundled up, and we made up games and pretended about King Kong and rollercosters. I don't know how to define all the factors that came to play, and don't honestly care to, but something between the weather, the outdoors, the random romping around and the bubble blowing and catching, I felt a weird freedom I haven't felt in like 2 years.

It was so strange.

It was a carefree fun feeling, but a really particular one. Like recognizing an old belonging you haven't seen in years and had forgotten existed. A feeling that really didn't look forward to later events or back on good times, or think anymore deeply than to simply say,

This is really simple fun, and this person I'm with feels the same way. Neither of us are thinking of anything other than dancing on the shadowy patio and blowing, swatting, and stomping bubbles.

It was really liberating to simply remember that this happens. Its not something one can plan on doing, it just takes the right person to be with. I hope to find more occasion for it one day.

Today I was lucky enough to hear John Piper in person as he came to Austin this week. And, as always, his preaching was completely dumbfounding to my spiritual status. Its funny to think that as I was going in, my excitement was clouded with doubt, thinking "How many times can one person who is so focused on very specific themes keep things completely fresh? I hope this doesn't just seem like reiterations of things I've already heard... " This is not to say that Piper is amazing, but that God is faithful to renew himself and reveal His truth, not to mention the fact that His truth is inexhaustible.

The sermon changed my entire view of the Apostle Paul.

The sermon covered one verse.

Colossians 1:24
Now I rejoice in my sufferings for your sake, and in my flesh I am filling up what is lacking in Christ's afflictions for the sake of his body, that is, the church,

This passage sounds heretical if anything! But the truth is that Paul does not mean he is in any way supplementing Christ's atonement. He is looking at the only thing which Christ did not do himself to complete the gospel plan. Christ did not stay afterward to spread the truth of His resurrection to the world. This is the "filling up"which Paul speaks of. So lets break this down further.

• Paul is speaking on his personal suffering. He speaks of his flesh. These are literal physical conditions he is dealing with here.
• He is doing something through this suffering, a goal is being accomplished. This goal is filling up what is lacking in Christ's suffering.
  
• Paul's suffering finishes what Christ's suffering cannot. He lives as a fresh and real example of Christ's historic suffering.
• This is for the good of the church. He suffers specifically to be a servant to God and give the gospel to those around him and the church.

Paul says in other places that if the gospel is not true, he is to be pitied as a fool above all of humanity! He lived a life completely destroyed. He lists over and again the intense treatment he received, constant near death punishments and plenty of torture, all so he could tell people of a gospel they probably would just hurt him for. He was slandered and looked down on by the Jews, who were his own people, and the Gentiles. He lived in constant knowledge that a lot of people wanted to kill him and he really had very few advocates.

That's a really dumb way to live if there's nothing to look forward to after your always eminent death.

As Christians, we should not only be okay with suffering. We should be looking forward to it as the greatest asset given us with which to honor and worship God and spread His truth! As Americans we stand in complete opposition to this mentality. May our entire physical lives be handed over in great joy to be destroyed completely as a testimony of God's worth and the lacking sufficiency of all of this world's distractions!

Paul lived his entire life in constant suffering and constant joy. He realized that the greatest blessings of this world were completely worthless in comparison to Christ himself and lived a life worthless to himself but completely devoted to God's glory.

I want to suffer so that Christ may be the only thing alive in me!